OK, so. Selma.
So far, I’ve seen it twice. I will probably see it again, at least once.
Between the first viewing and the second viewing, the offices of Charlie Hebdo were attacked in France. Also, between my first and second viewings of Selma, the NAACP offices in Colorado Springs were bombed and more than 2,000 people were massacred by Boko Haram in Baga. And then, the day after they massacred 2,000 people, Boko Haram used a 10 year old girl as a suicide bomber. I haven’t said much about any of this. I’ve got mixed emotions. I’m also reading The New Jim Crow by Michelle Alexander. And, I don’t think I’ll ever forget the blood-stained asphalt in Ferguson, or the defense attorney in the George Zimmerman trial saying Trayvon Martin was “armed with the sidewalk.”
So, along with the context I shared with you last time, I brought all of that with me to the movie because, as H would say, you can’t help but tell your story.
People keep wondering where our leaders are. I keep hearing people ask, “Where’s our Dr. Martin Luther King?” But, I don’t think it’s going to happen the same way it did last time. I think we are the change we’ve been waiting for. I think this is a movement and it’s going to take a while. Either we’re in it for the long haul, or we’re just looking for a quick fix. It’s still true: Rome wasn’t built in a day.
I’m trying to pay attention to my blind spots. Yesterday, on my way to a workshop on diversity and cultural awareness, a woman drove past me on the street and I made a snap judgement about her. I looked at her car and the way she sat behind the driver’s seat and the way she wore her hair and the expression on her face, and I labeled her. Just like that. The label was not nice. I want to stop doing that.
I still gravitate toward people who make me feel comfortable.
The second time I saw Selma, I wondered what white people might think about the movie? What do white people feel about how they are portrayed in Selma? With whom did they identify in the movie? I tried to put myself in the place of a white person watching the movie, but I don’t know how well I did.
Here’s the main thing I took away from seeing Selma, both times I saw it: there was no blueprint for the Civil Rights Movement. No one knew if what they were doing was actually going to make a difference. No one had seen the end of the story. Not really. But still, they were willing to risk their lives for something they believed in. Not at the expense of someone else but rather because they saw the benefit to everyone. “Injustice anywhere is a threat to justice everywhere.”
The movie I don’t want to see is American Sniper. I have preconceived notions and prejudices about the people and issues depicted in these types of movies and I don’t want them dismantled. And I have ideas about the people who are praising the movie and defending the man about whom the film was written. I have thoughts about why American Sniper is getting so much buzz while Selma seems to have been snubbed by the Academy of Motion Pictures. I do not have an open mind, and I’m telling you because I want to be fair when you and I talk about these things. We are in this together, aren’t we? So, while what I really want to do is go see Selma again, I am trying to talk myself into going to see American Sniper instead. Being uncomfortable is part of the process.
I’m trying to pay attention to my blind spots.
Some questions for you: Do you have any blind spots? What adjustments might you have to make in order to move from wanting a quick fix to settling in for the long haul? Have you seen American Sniper? What did you think? What were the lessons you took away from that particular movie?
“I have preconceived notions and prejudices…and I don’t want them dismantled.” That’s some honest stuff, Deidra. Thank you for leading the confession.
Also, white friends of mine saw Selma this week and said they were moved by it. “Powerful story,” they said. The last theater movie I saw was The Hobbit, which was neither moving, nor powerful. Sounds like Selma needs to get on my calendar.
If you see it, I’d love to know what you think, Sam.
Sam said what I came here to say. Your honesty sets a tone for the discussion that is refreshing and intimidating all at once.
Oh no. I hope it’s not too intimidating. 😉
Deidra, I rarely go to the movies. The reason is simple. I hate how loud they are (I literally wear ear plugs). And I don’t prefer when people talk through them. Somehow I always manage to sit next to someone who is talking or else who is sick. And I don’t gravitate to the violence, sex (overt), and foul language. If I’m in a theatre at all, it’s usually to see an old classic. We have a movie house in St. Louis that has begun to show old movies. All this said, sometimes I do see current films, and have enjoyed them, have been moved by them, and have learned from them. There is something about seeing a film on the big screen that can be exhilarating, and if an audience isn’t obnoxious, there is something stimulating and emotional in the collective “ah,” “aha,” or in mutually shed tears. Sometimes there is something magnificent in being moved by movies *together.” We’re all in this thing called life, together. I don’t know if I will see Selma….meaning, on the big screen. I will, but maybe not in the threatre. Deidra, you can tell that I pretty much wear my heart on my sleeve in blog comments. And I want to be honest. I take you at face value that you treasure honesty–no matter how ugly it can be. So, at the risk of being misunderstood or condemned (I don’t believe by you, but maybe by others), I will tell you as honestly as I know how: I’m afraid to go see Selma. I live in St. Louis, as you know, and it has become more violent than ever. In fact, there was just a shooting/killing outside a local theatre, not too terribly far from me, just a couple of days ago. I don’t have all the details. Honestly, I’m starting to be afraid to walk outside my front door. I live near the Galleria, where there was a huge protest not long ago. So…I feel fearful to see Selma in the theatre right now (though I truly want to see it). I think it was on your blog or FB page where I described seeing The Liberation of LB Jones in the theatre in the 70s, where my now BIL and I were the only European Americans in the theatre. I don’t recall the plot. But I just know when the “white” guy got pitchforked to death, there were uproarious cheers of jubilation in the audience. I was really frightened and just wanted to escape. All this said, it’s good to know what it feels like to be in the minority and to feel fear that others have felt. It’s good to put yourself in someone else’s shoes. And your post here? Well, there is a ton of wisdom in it, and I could elaborate on a number of points, but I need to close to prepare dinner (Mike and I have an engagement). BUT, let me just applaud this statement of yours: “I tried to put myself in the place of a white person watching the movie, but I don’t know how well I did.” Ok….this, besides what you said about we being the change, besides being in this for the long haul, this statement you made about *trying* to put yourself in the place of a white person….just even trying….is key to this whole painful reconciliation process. We must try just to walk around in someone else’s shoes (to paraphrase Atticus Finch). This is what I have been trying to do for several weeks now….not patting myself on the back because I have lived in mostly African American neighborhoods, or been a minority for four years at work in the inner city, or having African American friends whom I love, BUT WALKING IN THE SHOES of those African Americans who have suffered. I’m trying to put myself in their place anD to FEEL what they have suffered (and as you have thought about yourself, I’m probably not doing a very good job, but I am honestly trying). I did that today in listening to Part Two of a Focus on the Family broadcast with Karen……I never heard her last name, who was but a teen when the Baptist church was bombed and four young girls were blown to bits–her precious friends. I’m really trying to feel this and not just listen like I’m listening to a dry news reel. I’m trying to understand. I’m glad you are doing the same. Nothing is going to change until we all do that. And nothing is going to change without the Gospel. It is our only hope. I have rambled far too long here, and I shudder to think what you or any of your readers who care to read this may think, but I want you to know, with all my heart, that I am trying to be honest, and I am trying to yank my shoes off and walk in someone’s else’s. ~Love, Lynn
Lynn, movie theaters bring out all of my phobias. Not the least of which is the fact that I have to cover the seat with my coat because I’m not sure who sat there before me and what they did in that seat while they sat there. I know. Pathetic.
I am so sorry about the violence in St. Louis. I hear about it from many of my friends living there. It is frustrating and scary and sad. I try to imagine what it must be like to live there, and I don’t think I understand the fullness of it. But, we keep trying. We are in this together.
The lady’s name is Caroline McKinstry. She is the author of “As the World Watched”. Didn’t she give a beautiful interview?!
I need to see if I can find that interview!
Thank you. As Sam stated, your leading with honesty and humility paves the way for the rest of us.
As I’ve mentioned before, we don’t go to any movies, but I’ll eventually watch Selma when it’s available on DVD. While I’m one of the supporters of special ops that you mentioned having prejudices against, I still won’t watch American Sniper at all. I have a hard time understanding being entertained by war scenes. Watching them keeps me awake at night and stirs up old fears, but my husband and adult children read the book.
Blind spots? I’m sure. Like everyone else, I’m a product of my unique environment, education, and experiences. I’m defensive about being a rural southerner and the assumptions that we are redneck racists. I don’t believe I’ve ever been a racist – nor was I raised to be. When I was 17, I was attacked at night by a black man with a stocking over his head. I was fortunate to escape with no more than a broken leg, but he was never found and brought to justice. The police informed my parents years later – just days before my wedding – that they thought they knew who he was and asked if I would try to identify him in a line-up, but there was no way I could properly identify anyone who had worn a stocking over his head at night. He’d stolen my wallet with all my identification, so he knew who I was and for years I lived in fear that he would come after me. I was suspicious of all black men because of that experience. Truthfully, for a long time, I was just as afraid of white men I didn’t know.
I love you, Deidra, and I’m so grateful for you and these conversations. I, too, am trying to imagine what it is like to be black. To be the mother of a young man and fear for his life. I welcome the hard conversations and I’m committed to having them and listening with the same humility and honesty you model for the rest of us.
On MLK Day, I spent the morning in a diversity training workshop. One of the women, in response to a question, began with, “I was raised in the south, so…” I wanted to ask what that meant to her. What thoughts did she think we thought when she said that? I think I know some of the options. So, thank you for speaking up about the assumptions people may make and the way we may label people, simply by virtue of where they live.
Also, thank you SO much for sharing your story about being attacked as a young woman. My goodness, Patricia! I listened to podcast the other day. It was the On Being podcast and the host, Krista Tippett was talking with John Lewis about non-violence, forgiveness, faith, hope, and so much more. It was one of the most powerful conversations I’ve heard in a long time:
http://www.onbeing.org/program/john-lewis-on-the-art-and-discipline-of-nonviolence/5126
Over at incourage yesterday, in response to my post there, a lot of the comments were about struggles with fear. Here’s what I wonder: How did you get past the fear, Patricia? What suggestions would you give to people who have been hurt and have a legitimate reason to be fearful or to have a bias against a person or group of people? What happened to help you move forward?
Great questions, Deidra. The simple answer is Jesus, but I was in bondage to fear for years before I’d had enough and surrendered what to me was impossible to achieve in my own efforts to the tender, patient, loving work of the Holy Spirit.
Goodness…I could write a book here, because though God’s work in me has been miraculous, it was not instantaneous. I’d longed to go off to college after highschool, but I only lasted 1 semester. I failed all my evening classes, because I was too afraid to walk back to my dorm in the dark when they were over. When I finally did return to nursing school (while living at home), my first clinical patient was a black man who was diagnosed with TB the day after I cared for him. When I saw my patient for the 1st time, I wanted to run. I wanted to tell my instructor that I needed a different patient. What if he was the man who attacked me?!?!?! I willed myself to be obedient to my assignment, but I’ve never forgotten the fear that gripped me that day.
To quote Ann Voskamp, “fears had formed me.” For much of my 20’s, I did not walk with the Lord, and every decision I made was in the shadow of fear. It wasn’t pretty. I trusted people to protect me and made some of the worst decisions ever as a result.
Early in my 30’s, the prodigal that was me raced home to my Father, but it wasn’t until I was sick of trying to overcome fear on my own that I begged the Lord to rescue me. I knew my Lord as savior, but overcoming fear was a redemptive process that took time – in prayer, in reading and memorizing verses that spoke to fear. I can remember going to sleep at night with the Bible open on my chest – symbolic of how I wanted truth to penetrate my heart. I just kept asking the Lord to do in me what only He could do. The Holy Spirit opened my eyes to things the enemy would use to rekindle fear – stories, books, movies, TV shows, magazine articles, etc. – so I would avoid them. For the most part, I still do, but I’m not as vulnerable today as I was then.
A few years ago a young friend told me about being on the mission field and riding alone in the back of a taxi at night in a predominantly Muslim country. One of her Muslim girlfriends asked her, “Weren’t you afraid.” My young friend’s answer was, “I wasn’t, but even if something bad had happened to me, I know God would give me the grace to endure.” That’s where God has brought me to today, and isn’t that a miracle? I don’t know exactly when God redeemed my fears and turned them into trusting in His grace. All I know is that He did.
I think that’s what He has to do for anything in our life that we need to overcome: unforgiveness, bias, prejudice. We first need to be convicted (“Search me, O God, and know my heart! Try me and know my thoughts!” Ps. 139.23) and then realizing our great need, ask Jesus to rescue us from ourselves.
Thank you, Deidra, for giving me the opportunity to tell a bit of my story here.
Now we only see in part.
I’ve never been more aware of my absolute dependence on the Lord to guide my otherwise blind eyes. I look forward to the other side when all things will be visible. For now, I am glad to know that He sees all things and I am deeply grateful that He is on the Throne. And I pray that He will daily direct my steps as He has promised and oversee the details of my life that I may fulfill the purpose He created me for. If I don’t entrust His guidance, I will sink under the weight of all that must be His.
“In this world you will have trouble, but take heart, I have overcome the world.”
Take heart: be confident and courageous.
“Trust and obey, there is no other way.”
Give me my marching orders today Lord, and help me follow through in your strength.
Thanks for sharing your heart so vulnerably.
I love your positivity, Kathy. Thank you for that.
Deidra,
I appreciate your honesty and your humility…and yes, we all have blind spots..I think it is one reason why I know I need to depend on God so much because I don’t know everything…(no big surprise) and I’m still in the process of being changed to be more like Christ….who is love and holy and just…and I know I’m definitely not all there…we usually wait till movies are out of the theater so we don’t need to pay for a babysitter….Keep going there 🙂
Me too, Dolly. I’m still in the process. The more I live, the more obvious that becomes to me. 🙂
I am sickened by any act of violence or abuse that destroys life, it all is evil. I personally do not think there is a quick fix, I personally think the only permanent fix will happen when Jesus comes to bind up the master of evil, the devil. Until then I want, with God’s help, to love everyone, to give help to those who truly need it, no matter the color of their skin. My husband and I have worked with some of the most loving, kind, Godly people of several races and in them I found they were exactly like me. We all were born sinners, all are in need of a Savior, and the ground is level at the foot of the cross. Now how that plays out in my daily life is totally up to me. I can choose to be prejudiced for any reason or choose to be Christ like. Am I blind, yes, at times, thank God His eyes sees all and He has the power to show me my blindness.
I did see American Sniper and plan to see Selma. I put people who are killing innocent people in middle eastern countries right next to those who killed the black because of the color of their skin as well as those who killed Jews because of their race, all underneath the same word, “evil”. Evil has been with us since the garden, he got Eve to believe what God Almighty said was a lie…that’s where the evil started but thank God He will end it someday.
I so appreciate your courage for speaking out and since you are a courageous wise woman I believe you will take all that is said and sift it through the love of Jesus.
You make a great distinction, Betty. The other day my husband and I were talking about the difference between evil and injustice. There is a difference. Of course, all injustice and isms are borne in Sin, and our bent is to follow where they lead. But evil is something else. We can get victory over our isms and the injustices we may not even know we perpetrate against each other, by the power of the Holy Spirit and by continually submitting ourselves to God and allowing him to show us where we fall short. Because of Jesus, we can get freedom from our isms and sins. And, I think, it is good for us to try to move toward that as we grow in grace and faith.
Tell me what you thought of American Sniper?
American Sniper, intense. One, I would not see it twice just as I won’t see Unbroken twice or Selma twice. But I will go see them the first time to keep my self informed. I totally refused to argue about whether it was right or wrong to make these movies, they are movies. I was not offended by the movie. I felt patriotic at the end, thankful for the men and women who fought in any war to keep our freedom. I am sure I will feel the same way at the end of Selma when I see it, no preconceived ideas.
Blind spots? Probably, but I can’t see them 😉 Isn’t that the challenge?! We flock to community that is like us and won’t “dismantle” our perspectives. So that’s the value of these conversations. They’ve illuminated places I didn’t see and challenged and widened my perspective by “seeing” through your eyes and others who have shared. Quite honestly, I don’t know what to think anymore. But as my perspective has been dismantled by these stretching posts and comment boxes, the disillusion of the young adults in my life and their rejection of things I never questioned, and this chaotic world . . . I’ve arrived at two certainties. The first is “if one member of the body suffers all the members suffer.” I don’t have the option of dismissing another member’s pain, frustration, and anger whether I understand or not. And the second is the hope of the Gospel. “We have this hope as an anchor for the soul, firm and secure.” (Hebrews 16:9) It’s not just personal anymore. It is cultural, political, and personal. I know it always has been, but I’m just now really seeing it. I’m frequently asking myself how the gospel “informs” our circumstances.
“Quite honestly, I don’t know what to think anymore. ” Somehow, I think that’s a hopeful thing. I find myself feeling the same way, a lot of the time. I think it’s what happens when we begin to see things from someone else’s vantage point. It does dismantle our perspective, whether that was our intent or not. I think it’s a good thing, even though it’s so darned uncomfortable, not to know what to think. So, we sit with the discomfort—lean into it, even. Because it represents growth, and there is more for us on the other side.
I haven’t seen Selma yet but I will. I might see American Sniper only because I’m pretty sure my husband would like to. Like you I make snap judgments about people that honestly take me by surprise sometimes. As I mature and learn more about myself and this world I try very hard not to judge others so when it happens I feel awful. Some days as I watch the news, read the paper and scroll through social media, I lift my eyes up to heaven and ask God “why?” But I know the answer. Humans and our free will. The free will to choose to hurt, judge, steal, lie, condemn, etc… But then God shows me a picture of humanity at its best. A child who grows their hair long only to have it cut short so that a classmate can have a wig made to cover their precious bald head due to chemo. Or the neighborhood who makes sure that a child dying from cancer celebrates one last Christmas by decorating the entire neighborhood in October because the child won’t make until Christmas. There are so many more stories of love, kindness and compassion. Change happens when we allow our hearts to beat. To beat for those who are different then we are, to beat for those who are weaker then we are, to beat for the oppressed and marginalized, the poor, hungry and sick. Change happens when we look into the face of everyone we meet and we see the eyes of Jesus looking back at us.
Indeed, Jill. The snap judgements surprise me, too. They’re like and instinct that I have to train myself against. And yes to your last line. Well, to everything you’ve said, but especially the last line.
Judgements…. They come like breathing…. At least they were for me…. I heard a sermon that cut me to the quick… But thanks be to God it cut right to the depth of my judgmental heart… I encourage all to ask God to open our ears to the dialogue that goes in our head… It can be unnerving to hear the seemingly small …seemingly harmless judgement we make all day long….but small leads to large and thoughts are not neutral…isn’t this the scheme of the enemy?…to convince us that these thought are harmless… When God got to the bottom of my heart…I saw my arrogance… These judgements place me above others…that is what judgement does…it gives value to me at the cost of another… But love ascribes worth to another at the cost of myself!!!! These judgements went on in my mind without anything countering them for far too long… But we are never too old to be transformed….for our minds to be renewed…and like you said Rome wasn’t built in a day… Either will it be dismantled… God is kind and patient with my slow process….and I must be patient with myself as well and trust in due season I will reap a new harvest ….
Right now…. I don’t think I would choose to go see American Sniper… But I am staying open to my mind being changed… I don’t know how to reconcile the ways of the world and the ways of His Kingdom…. They are diametrically opposed to each other… The governments of this world… Can they really be expected to be ruled by His kingdom???? I don’t know…. As always thanks Deidra for your honest thoughts….thoughts that provoke us to dig deeper!!!!
“The governments of this world… Can they really be expected to be ruled by His kingdom???? I don’t know” This statement made me think of Hebrews 11. While reading it the other day, I was struck by how our heroes of the faith considered themselves strangers in this world. Rather than promote apathy, that thought brings an incredible hope and eternal perspective and opportunity to all our responses here. John the Baptist, Jesus, and Paul were all radical, political, and spiritual! Their actions literally changed the course of their cultures and history. And they were Kingdom minded! We are in good company.
Ro, thanks so much for these thoughts. I saw a very short (5 min.) film the other day that speaks so powerfully about the judgements we make. It was at that diversity workshop I went to. I’m going to share the link here, because it fits well with what you’re saying here.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=76BboyrEl48
Thanks so much for sharing this…powerful….and an extra treat….awesome tap dancing!!!!
So this is where I admit that I am often here before anyone has commented and it makes me sad because, one – I don’t want to go first – and two, I LOVE the conversations that you inspire here! Seriously – whether they are hard and heavy, or light and fun… you just ask the best questions, my friend!
Also – there is this… I haven’t seen Selma yet –I want to, but I don’t want to go see it with my white friends (deep breath) and it turns out I don’t really have any black friends inrl. Yes. This breaks me. I am trying… but clearly not hard enough!
I see now that in this small town, we are segrated much more than I ever realized. It feels like if I am being intentional in trying to bridge the gap… well, it sort of has to go both ways to meet in the middle. But I’m not sure if that is true… so I am trying, and praying, and putting myself out in new places… I want to be willing to walk more than half way, but what stops me is the same thing that has stopped up both sides of the gap… will I be accepted? Will there be grace in our preconceived ideas of each other? Can we overcome and find the depth of what makes us the same, more than what makes us different? I am trying… but still, I will most likely go see the movie this weekend, on my own. I will grieve, I am sure… for them back then – both black and white… for the parts of the story that are sadly new to me. I will grieve for us right now – both black and white… for the parts that are still the same! I will process… I will not dismiss it or push aside the parts that tear deep, but I will pray through the tearing and plead for healing and answers and steps to take to move this movement forward… for I believe that God meant it when He called us One Body… brothers and sisters and a Royal Priesthood… neither greek nor jew… the whole thing! I believe He means it when He calls us His. All of us.
As far as Blind Spots – This is why we need Community… because they are blind to us, but not to others… but again – Planks come to mind! We must be willing to be in relationship and have the deep true talks… the ones where we are willing to not save face, but offer saving grace instead!
I love you so, my friend! (Oh – and I’m not planning on seeing American Snipper either… for possibly different reasons… but just the same!)
Side Note(ish) – I’m curious to hear your thoughts and feels about shows like Blackish or Fresh Off the Boat? Good? Bad? Helpful or hurtful when it comes to racial discussions or stereotypes?
The first time I saw the movie, it was just me and H. There were others in the theater, but not too many. I think that was because it was Thursday night. The second time I saw it, I with a group of my white friends. The theater was more full, and many of us remarked that we didn’t recall seeing that many black people at a movie in Lincoln in a very long time. If I see it again, I’ll probably go by myself. And, if you see it, I’d love to know how it goes.
Great questions about the new tv shows! These questions make me nervous, but here goes: I watch Black-ish, and I like it a lot. It challenges my preconceived notions. It also affirms some of my personal experiences with racism in America. And it navigates, through humor (which often diffuses things quite a bit so that people can actually think about them) some of the tough issues with differences in how people perceive things across generations.
One line in the most recent episode of Black-ish really stuck with me. It’s where the family is planning a ski trip for the MLK holiday. Tracee Ellis Ross’ character says to her husband’s character, “Racism exists, but we may not experience it this weekend.”
I just spent some time trying to find a link to an article I read a few weeks ago about ABC and the network’s strategy with regard to depicting more diversity in its shows. Of course, I can’t find it. I don’t know about Fresh Off the Boat. I don’t like the name of the show. But, I also didn’t think Black-ish was the best choice, either. ABC has another show, Cristella, this year, too. It will be interesting to see how each of these shows fare with critics and viewers.
And then, of course, there is the whole Shonda Rhimes empire…
I always appreciate how you prompt me to go deeper with my thoughts on a subject. I wouldn’t even know how to begin to contribute to the conversation. I do know I can be quicker to judge others than I’d like. I appreciate the growth process of being more aware when this happens. I have not seen Selma but would like to. I have seen American Sniper. Primarily because hubs and I do just about everything together these days and it was top on his list to see. It was hard to watch. And while my husband’s war experience doesn’t come anywhere close to what was seen in the movie, I thought they portrayed well the effects war has on the soldier and the spouse at home. A part of me believes we as American citizens need to be more aware of what these families go through. Now I do believe we (military families) need to tell our stories to bring that awareness. I said more than I intended because I struggle with how to go there. Make sense? But I truly appreciate you, Deidra. Btw, I was really hoping to come to Jumping Tandem but my focus is needed at home. Many blessings to you.
Tempers finally snapped when the pilot added that
instead of returning directly to Nottingham East Midlands airport, he intended
to take the stranded passengers to Cardiff first. Settling into their seats,
passengers on a low-cost flight from Edinburgh to Nottingham expected a routine
one-hour journey. Little did they know that the captain intended to take them
on a 600-mile tour of the British Isles. Roman Blinds