My husband took me to Hawaii for my fiftieth birthday. On the morning I turned fifty, we boarded a plane and headed toward Maui. Ocean breezes, turquoise waters, azure skies, emerald mountains, extravagant sunsets. It was paradise.
For the first three days we were there, I marveled at the beauty around me while standing on the shore, or sitting on the balcony in our hotel, or driving to find the end of the rainbow in the mountains on the island. But I couldn’t relax. I was so tightly wound, it took me days to finally settle in to the slow pace of island life.
On the fourth day of our trip, I noticed something different. My breath came easy, and my shoulders were no longer hovering around my ears. “Whew!” I said to my husband. “I think I’m finally relaxed. I can’t believe it took so long.” What a surprise to find out just how ragged I’d actually run myself in the months leading up to our trip.
An interviewer once asked me, “For someone who feels inwardly fragmented, conflicted, or even hypocritical in the way they are living their life, what encouragement might you give them today?”
Good question.
Endlessly measuring my performance or talent or accomplishments or expectations or joys and sorrows against those of others’ often has me chasing after empty air, and using up all my resources in the process. In the end, I’m left with nothing but a short fuse, burned to its very last fiber. I burn out.
You too?
Jesus, as is his custom, offers us a better way. Rather than making the people around me my standard, Jesus reminds me, instead, to turn my attention back to him. In Matthew 11:28, he offers three guidelines:
Watch how I do it. Jesus set the perfect example of moving through life, attentive to the work God gave him. He was clear about his mission, and didn’t rush around, jumping through hoops, trying to garner the approval of people. He kept his attention on the work God had fashioned for his hands.
Learn the unforced rhythms of grace. Grace. Even the word itself falls gently on the ear and through the lips. It is not worked up or overwrought. Instead, it moves with confident assurance that God is pleased and nothing can separate me from his love. Grace reminds me my work matters to God.
Keep company with me. It’s easy to rush ahead of God, thinking I’m in control. If I’m not careful, I can leave God in the dust, or—at best—treat him like a side dish to the rest of my life. But Jesus reminds of the importance of keeping company with the Father—stepping away for quiet conversations to chart my course and identify those things that are truly important.
It isn’t always possible to get away to an exotic location and take stock of the stressors in our lives. But, daily, with these three guidelines in the forefront, we can follow Christ’s example, learning to live freely and lightly.
Some questions for you: Which one of these guidelines will you focus on this week? How do you define grace?
Oh Deidra! Thanks for sharing this today–ESPECIALLY today. Your words but God’s voice speaking directly to me.Today I “officially” start my day as the executive pastor at my church and now the only full-time pastor at the church. I also began my day without the pastor who has been a daily part–a daily asset–to me while I was his assistant and who walked with me through the worst days of my life before that. He begins his day in a new position in the real world, although he remains the lead speaking pastor here. The road before both of us is challenging to say the least. So my day began lonesome and daunting. I SO needed your words and the reminder of the unforced rhythms of grace. In staff, we have been encouraged to find one word and one verse for the year. I’ve been struggling with it as I try to put in one word and one verse all that I “need” to do this year in my ministry and my personal life. These words in the Message cry out this morning as mine because with all that I “need” to do, my greater need is to keep company with Him in the journey and to take the tasks ahead at HIS pace, not mine.
Whoa! That’s a whole lotta transition for the very first Monday of the new year! When I read your words, though, I have to admit I feel a lot of excitement for you. I honestly believe the best is yet to come, sister! I just said a little prayer for you—a prayer that you would feel surrounded by love and confident in God’s ability and desire to work in, through, and FOR you in the days ahead.
Thank you so much, Deidra, for your prayer and the grace that comes with it. I’m excited too, but kinda like the chubby little kid who steps up to homeplate at a Little League game, self-talking his way through it, “Just watch the ball, hit the ball, hit the ball…Ok run. Don’t throw the bat….Just make it to first base, first base…No! FIRST base!”
Thank you so much, Deidra. It’s crazy, regardless of how old we get, that there’s a pull toward others’ expectations and jumping through hoops. And on some days when we’re feeling really strong in our own strength, when we resist the pull, we can’t help but peek over our shoulder to see who is approving… who is shaking her head… who is looking at us in shame. I needed to hear your third point especially today. I want 2016 to be all about Jesus. I am praying this is the year I abide in Him and keep company with Him. Over and over.
I like that, Christan. The observation that we compare, even when we think we’ve got it going on. Yep. Been there.
Love this, Deidra. Falls right in line with my word for 2016: Rest.
Such a good word.
I love the emphasis on living in company with God. My default is to make everything into a system, when He has called me to relationship.
I get that, Michele. I’m always looking for a checklist. 🙂
“Keep company with me”.. is what will follow there is nothing as smooth and as easy going as the grace of God and finding out where to sit and dwell in it on a daily basis! thanks for this!
Grace is a place. Its a peace of mind about God meeting your needs and understanding your worth and value to Him so much you also understanding there is nothing He wil’ not perfect for you.( Ps 138:8)
Love this, Jennifer.
I’m so glad you got to experience Hawaii, Deidra! Such a blessing on so many levels! I think #3 takes us a long way toward accomplishing #1 & #2, so that’s my focus this week, and always. My definition of grace? Unmerited favor. You may not have meant the question literally, but that’s how I see it 🙂 Blessings on your weekend!